thanks to you

people in our lives come and go
sometimes by choice
some other time it’s fate
but no matter what the reason is
i am grateful to have met them

i am not who i am today
if not for the individuals
i have met along the way
who have been a part of me
and took part in this journey called life

i am thankful for all the people who
brings color to the world
gives meaning to existence
drives purpose in one’s being
and makes life worth living
that was what you are to me

and i want to say, thanks to you
hoping i could be the same
and be an inspiration
to all the people i met
and those i will meet

i had you...

i had happy moments with you, several times
we've been together, not just once or twice
just recently i have held you close
we've also talked for just while
and that made me feel i had you

but that was not enough, that i know
what we had was something i can't let go
but how can i, when you're not even mine
that's how it is, that's how things are
but for me its fine

losing faith

losing faith
that things will get better
losing hope
i feel i just wanna give up

feeling so tired
in this game called life
should i stop believing
that life is worth living?

working so hard
but it seems not enough
so my question is -
should i work harder?

i know i need to keep going
but how will i?
with the ways things are
it seems pointless

today has come to an end
tomorrow is a new one
is there something that
i can look forward to?
maybe yes, maybe no
maybe, maybe

what is this feeling?

you feel sad though there's nothing to be sad about
you feel alone, but family and friends surround you

you feel so distant
and yet you are just here

maybe it is the feeling of emptiness
the feeling of longing for something
but you do not know exactly what it is...

or maybe you are just tired,
exhausted from the troubles of life
or maybe its just me...
but i really don't know...

maybe you can tell...

you will always be remembered

lalo, that's what his family and friends used to call him.

i've heard a lot about him from mama and papa. mama used to work in his shop where she and papa met. i could say that it was fate that brought the three of them together. mama is one of his employee and papa is his kababayan as they are both from the same town in the province of Masbate. all these things came together and there lives got connected with one another. in short he has been a part of my family's life story even before i was born.

my parents decided to be together, settle down and had their first baby. the boss and the kababayan, becomes the kumpare. he even asked if he could be the one to give the baby's name and to call her - leah tatiana.

he's been to several places here and abroad mostly in Paris, the fashion capital of the world. obviously, he's into fashion. he also went to and stayed in Palawan until march of 2009. sadly, this was the place where he spent the last days of his life.

we have very few moments together...so few that i don't even have a picture of him or with him. as far as i can remember, i've seen him only once. i will always treasure that day. regrettably, it was a very short encounter.

i know that a lot of people have many stories and close encounters with him especially his friends whom i saw on the night of march 26th. i have heard stories of their fondest memories of him. lucky for them, as they have been a part of his life and he has been a part of theirs. they had the chance to get to know the person and got to experience life with him.

i am also lucky, as he had given me something that no one can take away from me. it is one of the very first things that made me different from the others and made me who i am. i will forever remember you...treasure the gift that you have given me when i was baptized. you may no longer be with us, but you are and will always be a part of my life.

you gave me my name which helped in getting to know myself and be known by others. you have been known not by some but by many whose lives you have touched. i am one with them in praying that you may rest in peace and wherever you are, i am certain that you are very happy.

ninong lalo, thanks! you will always be remembered.